Cole’s Mother’s Parenting: Lynn-adequateIn The Sixth Sense, screenwriter M. Night Shyamalan shares the story of Cole Sear--a boy who claims to “see dead people.” Throughout the film, Cole’s mother, Lynn Sear, struggles with how to sustain a relationship with her son. At times, she cannot find useful ways to communicate with Cole. Other times, she simply cannot be in his presence due to his troubling behavior. Some might contend she is a bad mother. I contend Lynn is a poor parent because she is oblivious, angry, and neglectful when dealing with Cole and his issues.
First, despite Cole’s hardships Lynn seems fairly oblivious to the problematic things happening in her son’s life. Due to his abnormal visions and behavior, Cole is a lonely child without much interaction with his peers outside of conflict. Granted, Lynn seems to have taken notice of Cole’s lack of friends at some point, because she arranged for Cole to walk to school with another boy in their neighborhood. However, she fails to notice that the boy actually bullies Cole and steals food from him, showing that her knowledge of Cole and his inner conflicts does not delve very far below the surface. Furthermore, Cole is deeply hurt emotionally, and at times physically, by his interactions with ghosts. Lynn barely seems aware of her son’s trauma until it is pointed out by others, such as when a doctor suspects that Cole’s injuries were caused by abuse. Additionally, Cole does potentially dangerous things in the film that a nine-year-old boy with proper parental supervision would not typically be allowed to do. He spends much of his time wandering around the city by himself, and even rides the bus alone across town to go to a stranger’s funeral. Based on what was shown in the film, Lynn seems mainly focused on her two jobs, which while important to support her family, take too much of her attention away from fulfilling her son’s needs. Secondly, Lynn’s temper is shown to negatively affect Cole. In the film, ghosts are shown to be able to have a physical affect on the world around them even though they can’t be seen, being able to open doors, move objects, and even cause bodily harm to people. Because many ghosts tend to gravitate towards Cole due to his ability to see and interact with them, there are times when Cole takes the blame for ghosts’ actions. A specific instance in the film concerns when the bumblebee pin Lynn inherited from her mother is repeatedly moved, and it seems the only person who could be the culprit is Cole. Instead of calmly asking her son if and why he moved the pin, Lynn angrily confronts Cole about the pin and accuses him of taking it. Then, when Cole sincerely denies that he had anything to do with moving the pin, Lynn becomes enraged and harshly yells at Cole, sending him to his room without dinner as punishment without listening to his side of the story. Cole is obviously hurt by this. While the pin was important to Lynn as a symbol of the memory of her deceased mother, I don’t think that moving the pin required such an intense reaction. I also think the incident illustrated Lynn’s inability to empathize with her son. Instead of attempting to listen to Cole and understand his issues, she instead instinctively reacts with anger to something she doesn’t understand. This harms Cole by not allowing him to have a proper outlet of self-disclosure. Thirdly, Lynn is routinely neglectful of Cole throughout the film. Lynn is a single mother who works two jobs to support herself and Cole, so it cannot be expected that she would have enough time to do everything for her son. However, Lynn barely tries to help Cole or find time for him. Despite the fact that her son is obviously suffering from severe emotional issues, at no point does Lynn even consider finding a therapist for Cole. She might not be able to afford a child psychologist, but even so there are avenues she could go through that wouldn’t involve paying out of pocket. Cole’s improvement due to his relationship with Malcolm shows that Cole would have greatly benefitted from seeing a therapist sooner. Additionally, Lynn does not go out of her way to protect Cole. While Cole is bullied by the other children at a birthday party and locked in a closet, Lynn spends time socializing with the other parents even though Cole had been acting out at school having emotional issues that warranted better supervision. Finally, at the end of the film, when Cole has a lead role in the school play that symbolizes the acceptance of his peers, Lynn does not attend the play. When she tells Cole that she could not attend because she was working, she does not sound sorry or empathetic--rather, her casual tone implies that her missing important events in Cole’s life is common. Lynn is a poor mother because of her general carelessness towards her son and her tendency to react with anger to his cries for help. Although I believe that Lynn Sear loves her son, I don’t think that she is capable of being as supportive as a child like Cole needs her to be. Were it not for Malcolm, Cole may never have gotten the help that he needed.
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The Sixth Sense centers around a child psychologist named Malcolm Crowe, whose life working as an esteemed child psychologist and living happily with his wife Anna is turned upside down one night when one of his disturbed former patients, Vincent Gray, breaks into his house one night looking for revenge. Malcolm attempts to reason with Vincent, but Vincent blames Malcolm for his misery and tries to murder him by shooting him in the abdomen, screaming “You failed me! You failed me!” Several years after this incident, Malcolm meets a troubled boy named Cole who reminds him of Vincent, and he becomes determined to help Cole in the way he wasn’t able to help Vincent, even as he and Anna grow more distant. At first, Cole rejects the idea of Malcolm being his psychologist, claiming “You’re nice, but you can’t help me.” Eventually, however, Cole and Malcolm grow to understand each other better and Cole tells Malcolm his secret, that he “sees dead people.” Malcolm is skeptical at first, but after hearing a ghost in a recording of himself interviewing Vincent realizes that Cole is being truthful and that Vincent likely had the same gift as Cole. After learning this, Malcolm is able to help Cole stop being afraid by teaching him how to listen to and understand the ghosts. In return, Cole gives Malcolm the advice to talk to her while she’s asleep. Malcolm does so, and through his conversation with Anna realizes that he died the night that Vincent shot him and has been a ghost the entire time.
I think The Sixth Sense is a really good movie. Even though everybody knows the ending that “Bruce Willis was dead the whole time”, the plot twist is still very well done and the movie is still enjoyable to watch after you know the ending because of all the little hints pointing towards Malcolm being a ghost that you might not have noticed the first time you watch it. My movie choice is American Psycho. It is set in the 1980s and follows the life of Wall Street businessman Patrick Bateman. Bateman outwardly appears to be an intelligent, charismatic man with a near perfect life, but inside is a violent, obsessive, sociopath who dislikes everyone around him. The movie follows Bateman as he takes revenge on a coworker who embarrassed him by having a better business card.
Possible topics: 1) Are the horrible things Bateman does in the movie real, or in his imagination? 2) Discussing the symbolism of the movie, for instance how the way characters in the movie repeatedly mistake each other for different people symbolizes how the businessmen are all interchangeable, etc.. I worked alone to compose my academic mindset project. For me, I think this is both a good and bad approach. Good, because I work best when there aren’t any distractions like other people being around doing annoying people things. Bad, because I think it’s beneficial to have someone to proof-read your work / make suggestions about things to add or remove, etc..
The most difficult part of my writing process was probably working up the resolve to get started. It takes a lot for me to start school work since I’m such a big procrastinator and I just got into a new video game (Stardew Valley). I tried to overcome this by closing my internet browser so I would be less tempted to keep wasting time. I think this worked somewhat, but in the future I might install one of those browser add-ons where you can block yourself from certain websites to help with procrastination. I wrote the majority of this project Wednesday night and finished it up Thursday when I got home from class. I think this was definitely a BAD approach since I was really tired Wednesday night after I got home from work and stressed out Thursday afternoon since I had just spent all day in class and had to get ready to go to work again that night, and I knew I probably wouldn’t have enough time to finish it after I got home from work that night so I had to really focus. I started out writing my paper in my living room, but then moved to my room. I feel like my room has a better atmosphere for writing papers; I have blackout curtains so it's very dark and calming. I chose to write my argument about being in favor of the growth mindset 1) because I really believe that having a growth mindset has some benefits, even if it definitely isn’t a perfect solution to students doing poorly in school, and 2) I feel like there’s more scientific evidence in favor of the growth mindset, so it was easier to find facts to back up my argument than it would have been had I written my paper more in favor of a fixed mindset. In the future I’m going to work on sticking to some sort of schedule when it comes to doing projects instead of doing them last minute. It’s hard, though, since work and school takes up a lot of my time and I have to sacrifice spending time on some of my hobbies if I want to get schoolwork done in a timely manner. Changing Perspectives A study found that many 10-year old students consider cheating to be a better way to improve their test grades than studying more (Dweck). According to a theory developed by Stanford psychology professor Dr. Carol Dweck, this is due to the prevalence of a “fixed mindset” in today’s students. Dweck’s theory outlines two opposing mindsets: the fixed mindset, and the growth mindset. Those with a fixed mindset believe that people are born with a set amount of intelligence that cannot be changed (Barshay). In contrast, those with a growth mindset believe that intelligence is something that can be improved and developed through effort (Barshay). Dweck states that students with a growth mindset perform better academically because they see challenges as learning experiences rather than evidence of failure (Dweck). I personally agree with Dweck’s theory and believe that adopting aspects of a growth mindset can be beneficial to someone who is struggling with school. In the past I had a fixed mindset and was easily overwhelmed by school work that took any effort at all, while changing my views in college has made it so that I can cope and successfully do things I would have previously given up on. Developing a growth mindset has helped to make me a better student because I can now see that challenges are meant to be persevered through, not taken as a sign of failure.
I consider Dweck’s theory about mindsets to be valid and worth considering when attempting to improve academically. According to Dweck’s theory, children develop a fixed mindset when they are praised only for the results of their actions, such as getting an 'A' on a test, instead of acknowledging the effort and studying it required to earn that positive result (Barshay). This type of praise causes them to believe that their success is due to inherent (i.e. fixed) qualities such as being “smart”, and to base their self-worth on these qualities (Dweck). I agree with this, as I was considered to be naturally smart as a child and as a result developed a fixed mindset. I never had to put effort into doing well in school as getting good grades just seemed to come naturally to me, and because I didn’t have any experience with having to struggle with something before I became good at it I would give up on any hobbies or activities that were difficult before I had even had a chance to improve. I quit gymnastics and playing the flute for this reason. Then when school work became harder around high school and I had to work hard to even get mediocre grades, I couldn’t quit so instead I shut down and started to feel worthless and depressed because I wasn’t “smart” anymore. Dweck’s ideas support this negative aspect of having a fixed mindset, showing that fixed mindset children show a greater tendency than those with a growth mindset to give up at challenging tasks and base their self-worth entirely around the end result instead of acknowledging their own progress (Barshay). Now, to do well in college I have to develop more of a growth mindset attitude towards things. I see that doing well in school is often more about effort and good study habits than being inherently smart or talented. If I don’t do as well on an exam as I would have liked, instead of giving up and deciding that I’m just not good at that subject and That Is That, I reflect on what I did to prepare and think about strategies I can use to do better on the next exam. I feel that this attitude has helped me greatly to stay motivated and maintain a good GPA in college, instead of giving up like I did in high school. Although Dweck's theories are widely accepted, there are still some that disagree that students' mindsets are as important as she proposes. Alfie Kohn, for instance, states that, “no mindset is a magic elixir that can dissolve the toxicity of structural arrangements.” He argues that a major flaw in the idea of fixed and growth mindsets is that it places the blame of doing poorly solely on the student’s mindset and fails to address possible problems with the learning environment that may be inhibiting the student’s learning ability (Kohn). I agree that Dweck’s theory is not perfect, but think that there are clear benefits to that should be acknowledged. She has done studies with children in non-ideal learning environments and found that growth mindset teaching is still beneficial to them, in one study allowing a class of Native American students to go from the worst performing class of their district to the best (Dweck). Additionally, Dweck acknowledges that parents and teachers can play a part in a student developing a fixed mindset, and stresses the importance of praising a student’s effort and process as well as positive results (Barshay). While Dweck’s philosophy is not perfect, I don’t believe that there is yet a better alternative to the growth mindset. I believe that having a growth mindset has helped me to accomplish more than I could have with a fixed mindset. Having a fixed mindset made it easy to give up on things, since you can’t be faulted for not being born good at playing the flute or doing gymnastics. Now that I have a growth mindset, though, I’ve become a more motivated, responsible person because I know that if I want to succeed at something it’s up to me to put in the effort. Even though I’ll never be as talented as some people, I can still become better than the person I was yesterday. Works Cited Barshay, Jill. "Teachers, Parents Often Misuse Growth Mindset Research, Carol Dweck Says." U.S. News & World Report. U.S. News & World Report, 23 Nov. 2015. Web. 20 Feb. 2017. <http://www.usnews.com/news/articles/2015/11/23/teachers-parents-often-misuse-growth-mindset-research-carol-dweck-says>. Dweck, Carol. “Carol Dweck: The Power of Believing That You Can Improve.” TED, Nov. 2014, www.ted.com/talks/carol_dweck_the_power_of_believing_that_you_can_improve. Accessed 21 Feb. 2017. Kohn, Alfie. “The perils of “Growth Mindset” education: Why we’re trying to fix our kids when we should be fixing the system.” Salon. Salon Media Group, Inc., 16 Aug. 2015. Web. 20 Feb. 2017. <http://www.salon.com/2015/08/16/the_education_fad_thats_hurting_our_kids_what_you_need_to_know_about_growth_mindset_theory_and_the_harmful_lessons_it_imparts/> The article “Teaching Adolescents to Become Learners” […], published by Chicago University, discusses the four academic mindsets: belonging, growth mindset, self-efficacy, and relevance/purpose. The relevance/purpose mindset is the one I consider to be most important. For me to be motivated to do work, I need to be able to see what I’m getting out of it. I can’t stand doing pointless busywork. In high school there were so many instances where I would look at an assignment and think “what is the point of this???” There were a few times where towards the end of the semester I would just stop doing work if I knew I had a high enough grade in the class that the missed assignments wouldn’t matter. It wasn’t even about being lazy, I just couldn’t see how doing these weird assignments was be worth my time. On the other hand, now I don’t have a problem with having to study hard and do a ton of work for a class like Human Anatomy and Physiology because I know that the material is directly relevant to nursing. Knowing that the material I’m learning is going to be relevant outside of the classroom someday makes me feel like I’m actually accomplishing something by learning it, and not just throwing away a bunch of hours of my life for a handful of credits. It makes me want to focus on actually learning the material well and not just cram for the unit exam. I mean, cramming for the exam can definitely still earn credits but it’s more stressful and leaves you with that feeling of ~~what am I doing with my life~~ at 2 am. So, relevance/purpose is the most important academic mindset to me since without it I’m unable to fully apply myself or motivate myself to truly learn.
According to psychology professor Carol Dweck, there are two mindsets a person can have about intelligence: the fixed mindset, and the growth mindset. People with a fixed mindset believe that a person is born with a set amount of intelligence or talent that cannot be changed. People who ascribe to the growth mindset, on the other hand, believe that a person can gain intelligence through putting in effort and working on their skills. Growth mindset is generally regarded as the “correct” mindset to have, although it is not without its faults. The articles “Teachers, Parents Often Misuse Growth Mindset Research, Carol Dweck Says” by Jill Barshay and “The Perils of “Growth Mindset Education” […] by Alfie Kohn discuss how adopting a growth mindset is not a solution for any problems a student may be having, as it can be applied incorrectly (e.g. giving hollow praise to students for effort even when they are not improving) and doesn’t address issues such as a poor learning environment.
I consider myself to have a mix of the fixed and growth mindsets. I believe that people are born with a certain level of intelligence and can improve themselves to a point, but some people will never be as smart as others. I do agree with the growth mindset idea that effort is the most important part of succeeding in academics (and life), though. Even someone who has an exceptional amount of intelligence or talent at something can’t go very far if they don’t apply themselves, and I think that anyone can follow their dreams (even if it’s something they’re “bad” at) if they are willing to put in the work required. My process for writing my hiraeth was a literal dumpster fire. I don't think I followed a single one of my six steps lol. I wrote it in my room late at night all in one sitting close to the due date, like I have done and likely will continue to do for every single school project ever. This is definitely a terrible approach, but it kind of works for me since the pressure of knowing something is due soon really helps me focus and write instead of stressing about ideas. I found the initial choosing of a topic to be the most difficult part. It was hard for me to think of something in my boring life that fit the theme of the project and was something that I was comfortable writing about. The free write we did in class helped a bit, though, since I was forced to think of possible topics to write about. Once I finally found a topic and started writing, the project felt a lot easier.
I think the best adaptation to my writing process would be to try and get in the habit of beginning projects a bit earlier, though. This would give me time to proofread my work (if I’m not too embarrassed to ever look at it again, which I usually am) or possibly have someone else look over it and give feedback (which I literally never do because I don’t like to feel the soul-crushing judgement of others). Overall, writing my hiraeth was kind of a struggle and I’m not really looking forward to having to expand on it more in the future. Slow Death This is my hiraeth draft - I might edit this tomorrow but I wanted to post it to my blog just in case.
``` I pressed a button on my phone, causing the screen to light up with the time. 3:36. Only just under two and a half hours until I would have to be home for dinner. I exhaled and placed my phone back down on the concrete step, returning my attention back to the street in front of me. The sun was a bright disc in the cloudless sky, casting over everything an oppressive heat that was made only somewhat bearable by a slight, warm breeze rustling through the trees. It was that awkward period towards the end of summer break where it was really a bit too early to begin thinking seriously about school starting in September, but each careless day was tainted slightly by the knowledge that soon you would again have responsibilities. Instead of making the most of the time we had, my best friend Miranda and I instead often wasted our days hanging around the neighborhood doing nothing or sitting around on her front step. Miranda lived in an unexciting looking house that was painted a light beige and had a roof made of tiles that had faded from black to a worn-out gray. The only thing that made her house stand out from the other houses on her street was the Japanese maple tree on her front lawn. I glanced over at Miranda, seeing her completely engrossed in playing on her phone. I clicked my own phone again. 3:39. I sighed again. Time seemed to be passing incredibly slow. That was the way it always was hanging out with Miranda, nowadays. At some point, Miranda and I had stopped being ‘BFFs’ and become barely more than casual acquaintances. I wondered when the turning point had been. The start of middle school? When we had stopped liking the same music? There had been a time when we had spent nearly every day together; where we had known each other so long and spent so much time together that we were practically two halves of a whole. You could have one without the other, but there would have been the underlying sense that something was missing. Now, it was rare that we would see each other more than once a month. And even that felt pointless and unbearable, like trying to defibrillate a skeleton. I clicked my phone. 3:47. Still not enough time had passed. I thought of years back, to when Miranda and I had been kids. Miranda’s house was a twin, and a few feet to the right of my friend’s front step was another that looked fairly identical. The neighbors were rarely home, however, so we had claimed their step for ourselves, to be used as an asylum when the wasps situated in a small nest above Miranda’s doorstep began to act up. I’m not sure they ever knew or cared that their front step no longer belonged to them. On days like this, when the heat caused the wasps to become restless, we would hide in our makeshift wasp-escape place, happily wiling away the time talking and making shaky chalk drawings on the bumpy sidewalk. We weren’t doing anything incredibly interesting, but back then it seemed like we could have fun just being in each other’s company. In the present, it all seemed insufferably boring. 3:51. Getting closer. It was hard to accept that Miranda and I had outgrown our friendship. That we could never go back to being the way we were as kids. But we had just become entirely different people. We still called each other best friends and did many of the best friend things we used to do together, but now it felt hollow and meaningless, like a person carrying out a tradition thats meaning had been lost to history. Even though letting go of the friendship would feel like all the time spent being Miranda’s friend had been wasted, it had to be done. I spared another glance over at Miranda. She was still starting at her phone screen. It should have seemed strange that my best friend and I hadn’t spoken a word to each other in nearly a half even though we were sitting right next to each other, but somehow, it didn’t seem unnatural for us. We had simply run out of things to say to each other. 3:58. Miranda and I had grown up together. And now we had grown apart. 4:00. Only two more hours. I exhaled. I could do this. |
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